29 December 2009

Still and Small and So Mundane...

So, this is a blog huh? And I am to be writing about myself?

That feels SO completely pompous of me.

Some important people said they thought I should start one though, especially when Emma arrives. I also have to admit that I secretly LOVE reading about other peoples lives on their blogs, though at times I seriously feel like a stalker.

Speaking of stalkers, if I have any hope of being truthful on here (which I would like to be able to do), I guess I should try to make it so that some people just aren't going to be able to find me on here. Because, honestly, I am incapable of being real in front of everyone. I put on quite the show, depending on who the audience is. I am an interesting person sometimes yes, but the real me is also a bit sarcastic and sometimes I bite. I wouldn't want anyone to get upset. I'll tell you the truth in my thoughts, but not always to your face with audible words. I write more the way I think, not the way I talk, and I'm aware of its potential to offend people. If you do find me on here, don't take anything personally.

Ok, so it looks like I may just be ranting with a tad bit of sarcasm on here for now. I'll tell you about all this later, when I have more posts for you to read and it looks like I'm a prolific blogger. Oh, and if you can guess which song my titles come from, I'll give you a brownie point. Just like Chibi and I used to do for the kids when we taught TKD together. Poor little saps.
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On Distant Shores

I have toiled for countless years and ever felt the cost, and I've been burned by this world's cold, like leaves beneath the frost. On my knees I've crawled to You, bleeding myself dry. But the price of life is more, than I could ever buy.

And off of the blocks I was headstrong and proud, at the front of the line for the card-carrying high-browed, with both eyes fastened tight, yet unscarred from the fight, running at full tilt my sword pulled from its hilt. It's funny how these things can slip away, our frail deeds, the last will wave goodbye. It's funny how the hope will bleed away the citadels we build and fortify. Goodbye!

Night came and I broke my stride. I swallowed hard but never cried. When grace was easy to forget, I'd denounce the hypocrites. Casting first stones. Killing my own.

Then You would unscale my blind eyes and I stood battered but more wise. Fighting to accelerate. Shaking free from crippling weight. With resilience unsurpassed, I crawled my way to you at last. And on my knees, I wept at your feet. I finally believed that You still love me.

~On Distant Shores by Five Iron Frenzy

kingyo